some rambling

i have a lot of things to say today.

1. i took a break from blogging for the last little while (like a week?) because, and i'm being honest here, it wasn't making me happy. i was focused on making it something it was never intended to be. i was focusing too much on what people thought. or what sponsorships were purchased instead of what the blog was created for.  jane and i started this blog so we would always be friends. as cheesy and cliche as that sounds it has totally worked. obviously i have nothing else to compare our relationship to, but with her in utah and me in illinois i love getting a sneak peak at her life. i like read her posts and feeling like we have had a conversation about it. we are lucky enough in our endeavor to have met some amazing people. we are part of this fantastic online community and for that i am so thankful, but i really need to put things in perspective. what is more important? my blog life? or my personal life. it seems like and easy answer (duh) but for me the balance of both has been tricky. if you have been reading and still read our little blog THANK YOU we are so happy you are here. sorry if we don't post every single day like we used too, but we are trying something a little bit different. we are trying to let this be sneak peaks of our life, a place where we share memories and moments of the actual life we live, while not letting it become our life. does that make sense?

2. which brings me to point 2, i have been feeling super silly lately taking outfit posts. i had michael take some yesterday, and maybe i'll post them, maybe i won't. i don't feel like i dress that well when there are SO MANY FASHION bloggers that do it so much better. however, those seem to be the posts that people respond to the most. so i am not sure what the balance is. i don't have fancy j crew clothes, i only own like two purses, wear a back pack most of the time, and rarely do my hair. i feel like my outfits are normal with not a whole lot of fashion-y things to say, but at the same time it is nice to get a little dressed up and have your hubby take some close up shots. so there that is. 

3. sometimes getting up in the morning to go to work is such a struggle. i am so grateful that i have a job and that it is in the industry that i love,  but at the same time it is still work. and hard work at that. some times i find myself waking up in the morning and my brain says, "NO! not today! call in sick!" and on those days i find i have the worst days. sometimes i can catch that thought before it flourishes and tell it to shut up. i say, "Shut up voice! I have to work today, but I can choose to have a good day and not hate my life." and honestly that is what has been getting me through as of late. that and my husband rubbing my back.

4. i have monday off from work and i fully intend to sit around in my pajamas eating tons of burritos and watching orphan black.

5. ahhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnd............. welcome to my brain ladies and gents. kthxbye.

--harley.