having a real job is more challenging than i ever thought it would be. this lovely shiny career that i have chosen, while completely enthralling, is exhausting.
sometimes exhausting in an i learned and accomplished so much today and my job is awesome way.
and sometimes exhausting in an all i want to do is watch project runway in my pajamas way.
there are moments when the fact that i am straight out of college just slap me right across the face. i have to face the fact that i literally have no idea what i am doing and scramble to pick up the pieces as fast as possible.
today was one of those days.
and i broke down.
TEARS IN THE WORK PLACE.
i literally tweeted, "cried at work today. i'm such a stereotype."
one of my co-workers saw me and asked what was wrong and it just made things worse. i said, "i'll be right back," squeezed my chin tight against my chest and speed walked all the way to the bathroom.
locked in a stall i took a million deep breaths and cried. ugly cried as quietly as i could. i offered a prayer and just said, "please help me get it together." i regained composure and dried my eyes. they were a little red, but no one else noticed.
i went back to my desk grabbed my wallet and left the building. i ordered a grilled cheese sandwich and tomato soup at jason's deli, called my husband, and people watched. i also wrote myself a list of what to do when your day sucks.
today was hard, but tomorrow is going to be better. and no one better yell at me.